“Who am I, where did I come from, where am I going?” These questions bothered him since his pre-school days. He was no saint and there was nothing extraordinary about him; he was just an average kid, albeit with interesting contradictions in the shades of his nature. Despite having an angry disposition, he was extremely forgiving. He loved life in general but remained largely detached from most of its temptations. He was intrinsically impatient but had patience of a saint to wait for things to unfold naturally. Being naturally shy, he was a little socially challenged yet he thought global. Several times in his life, he rose like a Phoenix.
Life was never fair or easy. No stage of his life passed by without leaving a scar on him. Life poked him every now and then, inconsiderately at times but sadistically in general. He could not stand injustice or unfairness to the humans, nor could he stand the pain of the birds and the animals. He loved ferocious and dreaded wild animals but dreaded humans who killed them. Disappointments characterised his life in general. He was disappointed with the world of humans, particularly, how they treated one another and the planet as a whole. National boundaries did not exist in his little world. He saw humans but not their religions.
Gifted with forbearance and compassion, he reacted rarely. He was neither timid nor vengeful, he was kind. Had he been vindictive, he would have burnt down his little world several times over, ruining not only his own little existence in process but also the lives of many other people. Despite being intrinsically sensitive, nature had endowed him with tenacity and the ability to self-introspect, which became his prime saviours through the journey of his life. In the face of brazen provocations, he restrained himself, remained silent and just walked away. He avoided futile arguments and primitive quarrels with regressive-minded individuals. As he kept severing ties with many a toxic mind and close-minded fanatics, his social world shrunk considerably – a price that he could not avoid paying. With that, in the company of progressive and benevolent humans, he became a humanist.
He improved as a human as he grew, time stripped off his angularities. The more he was battered, the more rounded he turned out to be. It seemed, to sustain itself, life had intended to squeeze out every drop of goodness that it had endowed him with in the first place. His pain metamorphosed into words, which he shared with the world. The world benefited. His pain had become its panacea.
Mercilessly, life chiseled and hammered away his little natural barbs, shaping him into what he became eventually – weathered and seasoned. His forbearance and resilience helped him in turning his pain and anger into his growth as a human. With each bout of pain, he lost a barb of his own. Compassion and empathy emanated from the wounds that the barbs left behind. Forgiveness personified him. He held no grudge, whatsoever, against even his worst tormentors.
His master had taught him how to redirect his anger and disappointments towards his personal growth and altruistic endeavors. Once he asked his master: “Master, why do bad things happen to me?”
The wise master replied:
“Son, you are born to evolve much more than many others. Don’t get bogged or distracted by what happens with you or around you. Keep moving ahead, focus on your goal. You alone know where you are heading to, they don’t know. You will be tested, your scruples will be challenged, not once but at every step of the way. Your tests will become harder and more intense as time goes by. Be stable like that mountain and flow like a river. Revenge is not in your nature. Be righteous. Your karma comprises giving and forgiving. You must not interfere with the karma of your aggressors, let them live with the consequences of their own karma.”
The wise master continued:
“Be assured, you are not alone; your friends and associates are everywhere. You belong to the world, and not just to a small group or any community. Attain internal stability, centralise yourself close to your spiritual fulcrum. Seek yourself. Use your gifts only for the good of humankind.”
His master set him on a path that traversed through contemplation, meditation and self-introspection. Along the way, divine elements of compassion, empathy and forgiveness filled him. As he grew, he realized only humanity and humaneness will make the world a better place. History taught him that forgiveness stitched the world together and was a panacea for healing the deep wounds of sufferers.
When people rejoiced at the plight of their past aggressors, he wondered: “How can the victims of the past relish the suffering of their past aggressors? Why has caused sadism in them? Why are they so vindicative? Why can’t they simply forgive and move on? Why do they carry the burden that bends their back?”
Socio-political attempts of creating social divisions between ‘us’ and ‘them’ infuriated him. Mob mentality and crowd behaviours never deterred him, he stood firm in his humanistic convictions. He called the faceless humans, who hid in raging, hateful crowds, as cowards. Some people called him mad, some a coward, some an agent of the enemy and some claimed that he leaned to the other side. Many a belligerent and vindictive raised their brows on his forgiving and non-violent response to the atrocities done by their past aggressors. Those closer to him repeatedly questioned his stance on this and that. Perhaps, they felt threatened by him or guilty of their own inflammable thoughts or were not quite sure about themselves. One by one, however, they gave up and left him. As they furloughed, he stood alone.
Once an overly exuberant socio-political activist, disguised cleverly as a friend, tried to motivate him to join their crusade and the so-called ‘noble’ and ‘just’ fight against the aggressors:
“Highlight how you suffered in the past, be vocal. Help your community. Denigrate your aggressors. Lend your full support to the warriors of justice and redemption.”
Undeterred, he replied:
“How will the vilification of those who did no wrong to me personally help our cause? Our suffering was not caused by a single individual but by our own complex circumstances and the dire situation that we were all in. As a matter of fact, the people who were responsible for causing that situation are now long gone. The people that you want to punish now did not exist then. If you unleash vendetta against the innocent, they and their descendants will perceive you also as an unruly, cruel aggressor. History will not forgive you. They will also react, as you are reacting now. When a victim becomes an aggressor, the cycle of redemption and suffering continues perpetually.
“If we punish people for the actual or imagined misdeeds of their past generations, is it not possible that we too could have been targeted in the first place for the same very reasons by the victims of our past generations? We must introspect deeply. Perhaps we may discover that our past generations would have been unfair to the past generations of our aggressors. Instead of the fighting humans, therefore, is it not prudent that we fight the ideologies and the reasons that made us victims in the first place?
“Stereotyping other people along the divisions of religion, caste, colour, ethnicity or nationality is the greatest blunder that humans have been committing since the times immemorial. That is why the world is in this sort of mess. Don’t contribute to the mess. Vengeance, vilification and redemption lead to a perennial state of suffering and disorder. We must not let our ego overwhelm us and enslave our wisdom. Issues born out of mutual mistrust and vendetta can be resolved only when one heart speaks to another heart, transcending fear and hate. Give humanity a chance to thrive and bury the hatchet of vengeance.
“Learn from history. The vanquished invariably resurrected and held their tormentors to account. An extreme always gives birth to another extreme. Resurgence of the fallen has always happened. If our thoughts of revenge emanate from the cesspool of our bruised ego or fallen pride, our suffering is guaranteed to perpetuate. Where hate and ill-will underline vendetta, suffering abounds.
“Vengeance causes much more damage to the vengeful than to anyone else. Forgiveness is a panacea but must never be misinterpreted as cowardice. Only the brave forgives. Bravery does not mean having to oppress the weak or the disadvantaged. Nature does not take revenge against the trespassers. Do trees punish those who cut them? Does earth swallow those who dig holes in it? Do birds and animals consume those who kill them for fun or consumption?
“My friend, at the end of the day, how can we close our eyes with our conscience knowing too well that we too perpetrated the wrong? A more peaceful end beckons us to reconcile the offended and the offender, and help to stitch the world together while we have had the time and the opportunity? Forgiveness is in letting go, it is also soothing and spiritually nourishing. Those who refuse to let go, carry a burden of unwanted toxic memories, which cripples them in the end.”
The conversation ended with that. The activist friend looked fretted and fumed a little but said nothing before taking his leave.
Every story has an end. This story will also have an end but only in due course. At the moment, it is a developing story. It is yet to be known how the world will treat him, will he too be devoured like many before him. The world is not known to treat its kind kindly.
Might may be considered right by only the timid and the compromised. In reality, however, only those who feel assured and certain about themselves and forgive their adversaries, despite being in a position of strength or not, are truly mighty. Revenge is an act of the weak and the insecure, it brings disorder and unhappiness. At his crucifixion, even Jesus asked for forgiveness of the people who crucified him: ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’ (Luke 23:34)
The profound Lord’s Prayer reproduced below asks for forgiveness:
“Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. They kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.”
The author pays obeisance to his master, Sri Bansi Lal jee Hakhu, for his love and guidance, and endowing him with the wisdom of Gurudev Bramhananda Saraswati and Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. The author also bows to the Gurus, in particular, Guru Teg Bahadur jee, for their unselfish endeavours to lift the downtrodden and the oppressed, and help the humankind.
… Bill Koul [05 Jan 2022 (Perth, Western Australia)]
Dear Mr Koul,
You have asked me how the piece will be received by our brethren. It will attract lot many provocative and unsavoury reactions from them.
Your approach to life and worldview rests on humanism, which is alien philosophy to most of our brethren. Lot of water has flown down the Vatista. Kashmir is no longer a Kashmir that lives in our minds, so aren’t Kashmiri Pandits and Muslims. Secondly, all religions except a very few have talked on humanism, forgiveness and virtues with forked tongue. Advaita philosophy gives man a status which is very near to God, perhaps equal to Him- “Aham Brahmasmi” But religions also makes devils and demons out of humans. Who they declare are not worthy of living and must be killed by whatever means to save religion from sacrilege. So our brethren will say that forgiveness for the dependents of aggressors is cowardice, and not line with our Dharma and teaching of Bhagwad Geeta.
Thirdly, you are telling them that their vengeful thinking creates a vicious circle of hate and vindictiveness. That makes them feel or realise that at some stage in the past they too were aggressors. This is unpalatable truth which they can’t digest. They are not going to accept the harsh truth that their ancestors were aggressors. They are likely to raise strong protest and call you names. You could be declared anti Hindu living in make belief history written by Mughal apologists
Fourthly, they instil the seeds of hate in their children and promote them to do be unruly and rude to persons from other religions and political ideologies. They may not stop them from raising guns against the people they hate. Intolerance has become the overwhelming characteristic of KP youth.
Lastly, many of our brethren can’t live without willingly consuming and expressing hate and anger, many hours each day, against all who they feel are against the ideology of Hinduvata. They are willing to sacrifice love, affinity and care of their friends and loved ones for hating Muslims in general and KMs in particular.
These fault-lines in our community are now overtly visible and threatening. I don’t think your call for humanism, love and peace is not going to enter in their brains which is hardcoded to hate and anger. So you expect brickbats from them. I also think that there is still a large chunk of our brethren who are not consumed by hate and haven’t lost hope in humanism. They definitely will feel elated to see that somebody knows how our hearts beat. They will love the piece. I am one among them. Regards Ashok
Dear Mr Koul, You have asked me how our brethren will receive the piece. It will attract many provocative and unsavoury reactions from them.
Your approach to life and worldview rests on humanism, alien philosophy to most of our brethren. A lot of water has flown down the Vatista. Kashmir is no longer a Kashmir that lives in our minds, so aren’t Kashmiri Pandits and Muslims.
Secondly, all religions have talked about humanism, forgiveness and virtues with a forked tongue. Advaita philosophy gives man a place very near to God, perhaps equal to Him- “Aham Brahmasmi”. We also have Asurs in our religion, who are unworthy humans. Other religions place man at the pedestal next to God. And, like Asurs, they have Satans and Shaitans. Religions have created a section among men calling them devils and demons. They declared them as unworthy of living and must be killed by whatever means to save religion from sacrilege. So our brethren will say the descendants of aggressors are Asurs, unworthy of living a human life. They accordingly need to be killed and sent to the netherworld. Forgiveness towards them will be cowardice. And it is not in line with our Dharma and teaching of Bhagwad Geeta.
Thirdly, you tell them that their vengeful thinking creates a vicious circle of hate and vindictiveness. That makes them feel or realise that at some stage in the past, they too were aggressors. This is unpalatable truth which they can’t digest. They will not accept the harsh reality that their ancestors were aggressors. They are likely to raise strong protests and call you names. You could be declared anti-Hindu living in make-belief history written by Mughal apologists
Fourthly, they instil the seeds of hate in their children and encourage them to be unruly and rude to persons from other religions and political ideologies. They may not stop them from raising guns against the people they hate. Intolerance has become the overwhelming characteristic of KP youth.
Lastly, many of our brethren can’t live without willingly consuming and expressing hate and anger against all who they feel are against the ideology of Hindutva. They are willing to sacrifice love, affinity and care of their friends and loved ones for hating Muslims in general and KMs in particular.
These fault lines in our community are now overtly visible and threatening. I don’t think your call for humanism, love and peace will not enter their brains hardcoded to hate and anger. So you expect brickbats from them. I also believe that there is still a large chunk of our brethren who are not consumed by hate and haven’t lost hope in humanism. They definitely will feel pleased to see that somebody knows how their hearts beat. They will love the piece. I am one among them.
Regards Ashok